SherlockxReader Let her Go

(PLEASE READ MY JOURNAL!! mutaraprimedreamer.deviantart.… )

(Author's note I highly suggest you listen to this song I am about to link, while you read. This is done on Violin, and I will paste the actual song at the end, please please listen to Both songs.   )

SherlockxReader Let her go

                John walked up the steps of the cobbled road of Baker Street. He sighed as ran started to drip on his head. He flashed his eyes upward and held a hand out, “Great more rain. I’ll receive a lecture on something about rain from Sherlock, do doubt.”

                He walked further still and adjusted the bags of groceries he bought in his left hand. He smiled slightly as his home came into view 221B. As he searched his pocket for his keys, he saw a glimpse of Sherlock staring out the window. John waited as violin music filled the air, it was only slightly muffled but with a nod John turned the key and unlocked the door, “Yeah, yup…He always does this. I wonder what case he has now...”

                But as John stepped in and he could hear the music clearer, he noticed something. The song was not one he heard before…and it had a touch of melancholy. He locked the door behind him and trekked up stairs. He opened the door to his flat that he and Sherlock shared.

                John glanced Sherlock over as he silently put the food away. Sherlock had his coat and scarf draped over the chair they were slightly wet, and so he had been how not to long ago. The man himself was still staring out the window, his back erect and his hands in the prober posture to play the instrument he held in his hands.

                Something was off with him, John could easily tell. He walked back to the coat rack and hung his up. He sighed then slowly made his way to Sherlock.

                “Sherlock?...Sherlock? You ok?”

                Sherlock snapped his head around and gave him a look as if he was saying, ‘I was playing.’  John threw up his hands in surrender, “Fine. But will you at least tell give me some kind of hint of what you are thinking about?”

“Sherlock?”…….

…….“Sherlock?”

……..“Sherlock?”

 

    Sherlock let John’s voice drift away as he continued to play and scan the street below him for the billionth time. All in all, he didn’t have his mind on the street, or the people passing by, nor on how in had begun to rain again. He did not wish to answer John, for if he did it would only cause more questions to be thrown at him. If he had answered if he would have said, ‘On the one person I could never truly figure out.’ As his mind drifted away with the tune he played, he thought of someone who had changed his life in so many ways…he thought of you.

                “And that one there…you see it?” You asked Sherlock as you both laid on the summer grass in an open field and pointed to the night sky.

                “Yes.” He said nonchalantly.

                “That one is Jupiter.” You smiled as you rested you hand back on your stomach.

                “Honestly, ________, I do not see the point in learning about this. It just clogs the mind of useful information that you ACTUALLY be helpful in future endeavors,” He sighed is silver eyes stared blankly at the sky.

                You laughed slightly and moved to lay your head on his chest, “But it is elementary, my dear Sherlock. Who knows, you might need to know a thing or two about space when you get a chase.”

                “Mmm...You actually think I would become a detective?” He frowned slightly and without noticing started to run his hands through your hair.

                You smiled sweetly at him, and intertwined your fingers with his, “And what is wrong with that.”

                He waved his free hand about, “I would have to go through schools, and read words with so little facts. It’s boring!”

                You laughed and he eyed you trying to figure you out again; so you winked at him, “Oh I know Sherlock, I know. So why don’t you...you know…make your own job like the one you told me about? ...um..”

                He looked back up at the stars, “Consultant Detective.”

                “Yes, that. I think you would be amazing at it.” You rubbed the top him his hand you held with your thumb.

                “Not possible. The people of this world have such little minds. They would never accept it…To them I am a…freak.”

                You hated that word, you hated it even more so when people called him that. It was completely untrue, Sherlock was not a freak he was a genius. In fact you believed that even Newton couldn’t hold a candle to him. You smiled as you adjusted yourself to lay on your side while still holding his hand and watched him carefully. His eyes flickered, he must be trying to solve another problem. You wanted to make him feel better however much that is worth to him.

                “Hey,” You spoke again to bring his mind back to you. If you were anyone else he would have glared intensely at you, but he valued what you had to say. So he let his gaze fall back to you and that was all you needed to know to continue.

                “Remember when we first met?” You smiled at him.

                “Yes. Of course,” He gave you a look like you asked him a dumb question, yet this look made you laugh.

                The first time Sherlock saw you was at his brother’s birthday party, both of your minds quickly went over the events of that day.

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    Sherlock sat in a chair in front of the fire place, trying with everyone once of his being to ignore his brother.

                “Come on! It is my birthday, the least you could do is try to have modicum of manners,” His brother pleaded.

                “I could if your guests had any modicum of brain cells!” Sherlock yelled at his brother.

                “Sherlock! No one likes it when you pick them apart like that!”

                “Well, I can’t help it that my mind it so beyond their comprehension, and it would help if Ms. Williams didn’t flaunt it everywhere!”

                “It was on the back of her shoe! And how was I supposed to know that she wasn’t invited! I didn’t even invite all these people!” Mycroft sighed, “Father invited them; he wants us to make a good impression.”

                “Well, I find paper work boring and politicians tedious and about as smart as a postage stamp.”

                “Sherlock!”

                “And you would know,” He smirked at his brother’s disgust, “wait I am being unfair. Stamps are smarter than these people…”

                Their fight was interrupted when you were pushed threw the door with your Aunt yelling at you. In just moments Sherlock scanned and learned as much has he could about you, and the aunt who was so very rude.

                Your Aunt looked as if she was about to yell something more, but when she noticed the two men in front of her and started to come up with excuses for her behavior. Most of which include blaming you, yet Sherlock could see the truth.

                He opened his mouth and his words spoke truth. They might have been a little harsh, but you didn’t want him to stop…it was incredible. He accurately deduced in a matter of seconds that your Aunt bought your dress for you and got in invited to the party. But on the way you were forced to carry gifts for Mycroft, and the weight was too much for you to carry. You tripped down and fell squarely in the fresh mud made by the recent rain.

                He spoke quickly and fluidly. He further deduced that your Aunt really only came in hopes of getting money of some short from the Holmes family. He was on a roll, he was even able to tell where you were from and what you had that day to eat. But what he would never say, was that he also memorized every corner of your smile and how your hair, even when messed up, framed your face in the most beautiful manner.

                As he went on, your smiled wider, but your Aunt was very offended and stormed off.

                “Sherlock!” Mycroft pouted, “It is very rude to insult a lady. Let alone two of them.”

                “Oh, I am not offended,” You finally spoke, “In fact I am actually impressed.”

                And that was the beginning of your relationship with Sherlock, no matter how much he tried to hide it, you knew he cared.

                “You are?!” Both of the Holmes boys spoke in shock.

                You smiled and pushed some of your hair out of your face. Your pupils dilated, Sherlock noticed.

                “Yes, I am. In fact I would like to say, what I have deduced of you two,” You stepped forward and gently grabbed Sherlock’s wrist and smiled at him. “You are the wonderful Sherlock Holmes, and this is your brother Mycroft. And you should really try to be more sociable on your brother’s birthday, even if you think these government people tedious.”

                “My, you are a brilliant young lady,” Mycroft spoke.

                You smiled and winked, “Not as much as Sherlock here. He is far advanced than I am, besides, I heard you two arguing.”

                At this the two men, laughed. My, Sherlock’s chuckle was quite something.

                “There is something else I have found though,” You smiled again up at Sherlock and he raised an eyebrow at you.

                “What?...No, Poor girl. You think that I love you. Why? Because you can deduce? While that is better than the rest of the brain dead people in this building.” He spoke with the blandest voice possible.

                “No,” You leaned up to whisper in his ear, “I took your pulse…”

                And with that, you flashed both of the men a quick smile and said, “Laterz!”

 

                You made Sherlock curious so he decided to make his way through the party to watch you. You were a mystery to be solved, but suddenly a man started to gag and fell to the ground dead. Everyone just stared and gasped, some girls screamed except for you and Sherlock. Both at the same time, you ran over to the man crumpled on the carpet.

                And right then the two off you knew that together you would solve this case. You followed Sherlock around the house taking in everything he said, did, and every look he gave. Then a smile flashed across his face, he led you out to the garden, “This plant what do you know of it?”

                You glanced it over, and immediately knew it to be poisonous, when digested…and…a part of it has been pulled off of it. You couldn’t help but smile as you turned to Sherlock. A break in the case!

                “Someone poisoned him with his plant!” You spoke and Sherlock joined in, “By putting it in his tea!”

                “Oh Brilliant!” Sherlock smiled and gave a small hop slightly fist bumping the air just in front of his chest.

                Sherlock started the song on his Violin again and closed his eyes to remember your face on that meadow night

                You stared up at him and smiled, “Then you know how smart you are, of course you can be a consultant detective.”

                Sherlock frowned, “Who would listen? Where would I go?

                “I am, and London. Mrs. Hudson would love to have you around. Besides Scotland Yard needs all the help it can get,” You said quickly like you had been thinking about this for a long time.

                You last comment, made Sherlock chuckle a bit, you always knew how to make him smile.

                “Tell you what, Sherly. If I can figure out when your birthday is and give you gifts that you can’t possible hate, then you have to start taking cases and one day make your way to London. Deal?” You sat up looking down at him with the stars shining in your eyes.

                Sherlock rolled his eyes slightly no one could figure that out, “Deal.”

                You spent the next day determined to figure it out, but you always had a way with people. Mycroft might have been sworn to secrecy, for whatever reason (maybe Holmes didn’t care for parties?), but their dad wasn’t.

                So on the appointed day, you had gifts set out in Sherlock’s living room and you wore your best dress. Sherlock came around the corner, surprise on his face, but he quickly hid it. He sat down in front of you and sighed, “Fine, give me your gifts. Not that they would do much good anyway.”

                You smiled, he was just upset because he lost; but you could tell he was proud of you too. He had been teaching you a lot about deduction, and though you didn’t always understand you loved hearing him talk about it. You even loved hearing about the 243 different types of Tobacco Ash. You even helped him put it online, you didn’t care if no one else read it, you did twice a day. Because it was written by Sherlock.

                You smiled widely and told him to pick one.

                “Oh come on, does it really matter which on is first?”

                “Pick,” You smiled.

                He rolled his eyes and pointed to one. You got up and gently set it in his lap. He ripped off the paper not caring were it fell…it was a violin chase, he slowly opened it. Inside was the most beautiful violin he had ever seen. It could tell instantly that it was vintage a German violin made circa 1880.

                You smiled as he carefully traced the rim of it with his finger, “Now, no matter how stuck you get on a case or how deep in thought you need to be just play this and you will figure it out.”

                “I…Thank you…” He barely whispered, you knew him so well.

                “You better take care of that you hear. It used to be mine.” You grinned playfully, “Now I picked out something every consultant detective must have.”

                You walked over to a long thin box and a smaller square box, as Sherlock watched you intently. He didn’t want to admit it but yes, he did love you, perhaps more than anything he had ever loved.

                “Now, these I made so there is no other like it in the world and no one can track you with them,” You turned to Sherlock holding the long thing one, “Stand up if you please.”

                Quietly he did so and you opened the box, revealing with a tender smile a long slightly blue trench coat, “Every detective needs a trench coat, but I won’t have you walking around in those stereotypical brown ones.”

                You help him put it on, it fit him so well, in so many ways. You couldn’t help but stare into his amazing eyes, and he couldn’t help but stair into yours. He was starting to look at you differently now, no more where you just another person, but you were someone he wanted to know everything about. Because in spite of his issues you loved him, and you were investing so much into him.

                “When you have this on, I will always be with you. Like I am hugging and protecting you,” You spoke tenderly.

                Sherlock nodded, his eyes were so much kinder looking now. You turned and opened the smaller box and pulled out a blue scarf, “For the cold nights and days in London, and blue that you will always think and remember that you are a genius.”

                Blue was his and your color, you both wore it the night you first met. Your dress and his suit. Let tilted down slightly so you could wrap it around his neck. The air had suddenly become so thick…

                “Also when you flip your collar up like this,” You turned the trench coat’s collar up, “It makes you look cool.”

                Sherlock had surprised you, you had expected him to roll his eyes or say that you were being sentimental, but he listened to your words like all the times you listened to him. Like every word was water in a dry desert.

                “Cool…” He repeated looking at your gifts then back at you.

                You nodded and smiled, he was so close to you now. It was as if the world outside no longer existed. He believed you now, all those times you told him caring was important, friends were life savers, and love was not a weakness. He now understood, because he felt it.

                “Ms. ______ ______, I do believe I am in love with you,” He gently lifted your chin and kissed you. Not on the cheeks like when he said something rude or when he got carried away with excitement, but on the lips. It was a tender and gentle moment.

                You wrapped your arms around him as he did the same to you, and you deepened the kiss.

Sherlock as he played the violin you gave him and remembered your first kiss together. Took a sharp breath in, and let the tune of the violin take him to more memoires you shared together.

                The two of you took on many cases together big and small. Sherlock loved the more complex and curious ones. For many reasons, he got to think harder and show his skills off to you. He also loved how focused you always looked when you were trying to figure it out. Even if he knew the answer already he would wait and watch you, until you figured it out (to which he smiled with approval) or you asked for help. (Then he would love to show off for you.) He had become softer and kinder with you around. The two of you even planned to earn enough money to move to London.

                But all good things come to an end whether we like them to or not. Sherlock came home to find his brother waiting for him with a letter in him hand.

                “You have been running with a dangerous crowd, Sherlock.” He spoke calmly.

                “The only dangerous crowd I have been around is your government friends,” Sherlock quipped.

                “This is not the time for jokes! You..,” Mycroft sighed, “You have to let her go.”

                “What?”

                “Here, it seems one of the people you put away has told you that he plans to take his revenge on you. Now, Sherly…”

                “Only she can call me that,” Sherlock interrupted as he took the letter and read it. Mycroft was right, much to Sherlock’s dismay. A very evil man that the two of you had taken down together, one that claimed he worked for someone who was a kind of consultant too. He had found a way to blackmail Sherlock, and this man was going to use you as something Sherlock had to let go of. Why? Because this man knew it hurt.

                “Sherlock, you have to let her go. It’s not safe for her anymore.” Mycroft tried to sound sympathetic.

                “Oh, do be quiet brother. Oh and the door is there,” He pointed behind himself.

                Mycroft sighed and quietly left the room, and Sherlock knew that he was right. He had to let you go to protect you.

                You always had impeccable timing, for not but a few moments later you came waltzing in and hugged Sherlock from behind.

                “Hey Sherlock, do you have another case?” You smiled.

                “No,” he stuffed the paper in his chest pocket and walked out of your embrace. He had suddenly grew so cold to you.

                “Sherlock, what is the matter?” You asked concerned.

                “It’s just…” He said with his back turned to you.

                “It’s just what?” You inquired.

                Sherlock was silent for what seemed forever, “I don’t want to see you anymore.”            

                Your heart crashed to the bottom of your stomach, “What?...Why?”

                Sherlock swallowed and still did not face you, “Because…you bore me.”

                Your heart broke, “No, you’re lying! What is really going on!?”

                He said nothing.

                “Sherly!?”

                “You may leave now.”

                “Sherlock!” You cried as you jumped to him as grabbed the paper out of his chest pocket.

                “No...No don’t read that,” he whispered.

                Your face went white as you read it, it was a death threat to you if you did not stop helping Sherlock.

                “What is this?” You held up the paper, “Is this why you are shoving me away?”

                He looked at you grimly but said nothing.

                “Sherlock, we have already been through so much together. Why would this stop us now?”

                Nothing

                “Answer me, please” you begged.

                Nothing

                “ANSWER ME!” You practically screamed as tears started to fall.

                “Because I can’t watch you die!” He grabbed you and shook you a little bit, then hung his head, “So…I’m letting you go...to save your life…”

                You stood there numbly for a few seconds until you wrapped your arms around him, “Don’t I have a say in this?”

                “No,” He shoved you away, “You may leave now.”

                You stood in shock, he really meant this…

                “I…I…”

                “Go, please. Find someone else, tell everyone we are no longer together. You can say you ended it if you like.” He turned away from you again.

                You clinched your jaw, “No…I …No Sherlock. I will never leave you, I love you.”

                “Well, I NEVER LOVED YOU!” He screamed, and you took a couple steps back in fear and pain.

                In an instant he realized what he said. It was a lie, he wanted to protect you…but that was not the way to do it.

                “I...I’m sorry…I didn’t,” He spoke softly as he watched tears start to fall from your face.

                You shook your head and ran out the door, fine if he wanted you to leave then so be it.

                When he heard the front door slam and you leave fully away, he kick over the coffee table and fell to the floor. He would make that man pay for this.

                He did nothing for a few day, until he finally made up his mind that he couldn’t stand not having you around. He was going to go find you, but on his way out a police officer stopped him at the door. They needed his help with a case, they found a young woman dead, but could not find any evidence as to how.

                He reluctantly agreed, he would look it over then find you. Maybe he could convince you to help with the case and thing could get back to the way they were.

                It took no time to find the crime scene, but Sherlock wished he hadn’t. The young girl that was found, was…you…He went numb. Then an officer found a letter in your pocket, it was addressed to Sherlock. You had sweetly written.

                ‘My dear Love Sherlock,

                Do not grieve for me, I know you will find the man who did this. You are smarter than he is and I have left behind clues. You know it was the same man you sent you the letter that caused us to fight, but I know you didn’t mean what you said. I know you love me, and know that I have always loved you. Ever since I first saw you.

                So do this for me, do not blame yourself, and just catch this guy. On the following page I have written everything I had found on him. You see, I had decided to go after him myself. So we could be together, but I have failed.

                So, catch this guy and go to London. Find Mrs. Hudson and become the world’s first Consultant Detective. Play your violin, wear your coat, and scarf, and know that I am with you. And Sherly, Let me go. Find some friends, don’t let yourself be alone.

                                                                                                                                                All my Love,

                                                                                                                                                ________ _______”

 

                You were right, he did catch the guy rather fast. And it seems you did help him with this case after all with you notes you had taken. He did go to London, and he always wore the trench coat and scarf you gave him, and he did become what he dreamt to be. He also worked in morgue as well.

                But without you he grew cold and Mycroft grew very concerned over him. He disliked his brother very much now and scowled every time he used the nickname, ‘Sherly.’ He hated the idea of love and sentiment sighting them as weakness, because it reminded him of you. Yet, he took to drugs saying it forced his mind to work harder. I a way he was telling the truth, he took them so he could remember you more, trying to remember your amazing smile, and at the same time try to forget. He only ever took the strange and curious cases, he knew how much you loved those. He was still trying to impress you…but he fell into deep mood swings when he had no cases. He would say he was bored, but without something to do he kept thinking of you, and without cases he felt like he was starting to lose memory of you. He wanted to be close to you, yet, he would never tell anyone his true reasons.

                “Sherlock?”

                                                                                            “Sherlock?”

                “Sherlock?”

                John pulled him from his thoughts, “Are you going to tell me anything?”

                Sherlock saw his next case come from across the street aiming for his flat he now shared with John. Even though he tried not to make new friends as you asked him to, it happened anyway. Some might even say that you were still looking out for him.

                Sherlock slipped back on his trench coat a little slower than normally. He could almost smell your perfume. John kept asking him, but Sherlock closed his eyes. He felt a hug from behind, like the last day he saw you. Maybe he was seeing things or hearing things, but he could actually hear you. He heard an echo of your voice whisper in his ear, “Let me go…”

                At the same time John repeated his question. Sherlock slipped on the scarf in the manner like you first put it on him, and said out loud,

“Never…”

                John stopped pestering him assuming that he was talking to him and fallowed him out the door to the street for the next case, but Sherlock wasn’t talking to him. He was talking to the ‘On the one person I could never truly figure out.’

                You, He would never let you go, ever again.

   P.S Just think of this Song as Sherlock Thinking of you.)